I discuss kids that I refer to as “sensitive nervous system kids” who present as challenging and willful and how they are usually misunderstood and frequently misdiagnosed as having conditions like ADHD.
As parents we are often confused about what to do and what our options really are when it comes to these strong willed kids. Unfortunately, when we turn to traditional resources we are often led down a 1 size fits all path and it’s often not the right one for our kids.
I’m on a mission to let other parents with a strong willed or sensitive nervous system kid know that there other solutions to consider besides the classic ADHD with a side of anxiety diagnosis that so many of these kids receive from western medicine doctors and therapists.
These kids that repeatedly act out at home and/or school are often misunderstood when we try to attack the behavior with old school punishment tactics in an effort to shut down the misbehavior. Basically I shared my thoughts on this situation and the misunderstood rabbit hole I’ve seen many families with sensitive nervous system kids go down.
When a kid acts out, the way most of us have been raised, we think we need to establish a boundary during those moments by restating the rules and teaching about acceptable behavior. This never works to shut down the behavior. In fact, it usually exacerbates it!
When a kid acts out, they are trying to let the adults in their life know how they are feeling on the inside. They want to feel better, behave better and they want our help. They need our support, not our lectures, in these moments.
The real solution is to get curious and investigate what’s underneath the behavior so we can really understand what’s going on. Our kids have to feel like we are on their team to trust us to help them process through their big emotions.
Empathy and having positive communication is how our strong willed kiddos begin to allow us to guide them to behave better. Start empathizing and ditch the lectures. These sensitive nervous system kiddos thrive with this new productive parenting conversation.
Conscious Discipline https://consciousdiscipline.com
Dr. Ross Greene http://drrossgreene.com
As always, thanks for listening, and be sure and head over to Facebook and you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community, where we post tips and tools and do pop up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!
About Randi Rubenstein
Randi Rubenstein helps parents with a strong-willed kiddo become a happier family and enjoy the simple things again like bike rides and beach vacays.
She’s the founder of Mastermind Parenting, host of the Mastermind Parenting podcast, and author of The Parent Gap. Randi works with parents across the U.S.
At Mastermind Parenting, we believe every human deserves to have a family that gets along.
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